Are you an Energy Vampire?

What is an energy vampire?

In Literature and popular culture we only talk about tales of blood sucking vampires,  these are fictitious characters that were spawned by creative writers of the past, but the topic about energy vampires is something that is real, and people of today are now staring to have an idea about what it is.

The question what is an energy vampire, can be answered by this. Have you ever felt weak, tired, hungry or lonely after talking to a certain person? Perhaps, a family member who always seems to have problems or is always talking about a negative aspect of their life?

Have you ever tried talking to a boyfriend or girlfriend who literally sucks the energy out of you,  have you ever felt the need to be away from certain family members or friends for a certain period of time because you are overwhelmed? 

You might be dealing with an energy vampire, someone who can either be sucking the energy out of you in purpose or unknowingly.

Most energy vampires do not know that they are doing, they don't know that they are stealing the energy of other people, this has probably been the technique that their parents used on them while growing up and they were  unconsciously carrying it until they grew up.

How to know if you are an energy vampire?

1.  Are you always negative?

Do you always find yourself saying " you are just being realistic"? Negative people are some of the biggest suckers of energy.  From the  moment they wake up, until their last thoughts at night- they will be negative. They will start complaining about everything, it could be the food, the weather,  the people around them, their workmates, their partner, their job.

This people might seem intelligent, they are usually intellectuals but with a borderline type of arrogance, they believe that they are better than every one. Most of them, would love dissing every celebrity they see, or every other person around them.

This type of energy vampire is very argumentative, they will not allow you to win in any conversation, they always need to have the last word.  Negative people will usually hate individuals who are positive, or enjoying at the present  moment and at times they will find a way to do something in order to bring the positive vibration of the other person down.

2. People who are always depressed

Depression is a stage, but if a person is taking too long at being depressed and often seem to be needy or critical of themselves all of the time, they have the tendency to suck the energy out of other people.

Do you feel like you are a victim of circumstances that other people are out to get you?  Energy vampires are those that always blame other people with what happened to them, they don't acknowledge the possible mistakes they have made that led to a certain situation, they always feel that someone has wronged them.

Even if you do your best to cheer them up, they will eventually go back to their old ways and will still feel depressed and cling to other people. Even if you volunteer to talk to them for hours, the joy would be short lived, they will find ways to be sad again.  It has become their identity.

You would mostly think that this people, are giving thanks to you for listening to them for a while, but the joy they have will only last for one day or several hours. They will soon find another life topic to be sad about.

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When dealing with an energy vampire you will mostly feel weak after the conversation, you will  have an increased need to eat, you might even experience headaches and low energy.

 Some, when dealing with energy vampires will feel a tightening of their chest, after talking to that person they might suddenly feel weaker, while the other person starts feeling better.  Some, will even experience stomach aches and other physical illness. 

Most energy vampires will hurt intuitive people, and not the non-sensitive ones.  An intuitive person, will feel the emotions of the  energy vampire and can absorb them if they are not careful.

Here are suggestions taken from Dr. Judith Orloff in order to protect yourself against energy vampires:

Strategies for Dealing With Energy Vampires

• Take an inventory of people in your life who give energy, and people who drain. Specifically identify the energy vampires, and begin to evaluate ones you'd like to limit contact with or eliminate. Plan at least one complete afternoon with people who give off positive energy and avoid drainers. Notice how this beneficially affects your physical and emotional well-being.
• 
  
• Set Clear Boundaries. It's crucial to limit the time you spend discussing a vampire's gripes. When approaching her, remember: the difference between being a bitch and setting boundaries is attitude. Instead of saying, "You're selfish and self-obsessed, I can't take you anymore," which a part of you likely feels, take a breath and shift to your heart.
• Meditate. Sitting in meditation is a life-line to your center, to the earth. it will ground you when you've been struck by a vampire. By calming the mind, you can re-align with your essence. Close your eyes. Focus on your breath. Then gently extend your awareness downward to strata, bedrock, minerals, and soil. From the base of your spine begin to feel a continuity with the earth's core. Picture having a long tail that roots in that center. Allow the earth's energy to infuse your body and stabilize you. If you meditate for five minutes or an hour this is sacred time.
• Walk away. If you feel your energy being zapped don't hesitate to politely excuse yourself from a killing conversation. Move at least twenty feet from the person, outside the range of his or her energy field. "I have to go to the bathroom" is a foolproof line. Most people are oblivious to how their energy impacts others. For years, reluctant to hurt anyone's feelings, I needlessly endured these types of situations and suffered. How many of us are so loathe to appear rude that a raving maniac can be right in our face, and still we don't budge for fear of offending? In a spot, physically removing yourself is a sure quick solution.

Additional Notes about Energy Vampires:

ENERGY VAMPIRES

An energy vampire is a person or being who feeds off the “life force” of other living creatures.Energy vampires drain your spirit and soul by depleting your positive energy. A good example is the drama queens, leave you feeling drained and listless. Psychic vampires are represented in the occult beliefs of various cultures and in fiction. There is no medical recognition or scientific consensus supporting this claim.

Energy vampires drain positive energy in many ways, such as:

Intruding on your life, ignoring boundaries and privacy (energy vampires don’t think of you).
Making big deals out of nothing. Energy vampires are often called “drama queens” because they can turn a broken nail into a Shakespearean tragedy.
Complaining constantly about their partners, jobs, children, bad luck, and illnesses. Energy vampires like to vent.
Criticizing your hair, appearance, job, children, partner, friends, and pets (energy vampires aren’t positive).
Not taking “no” for an answer. Energy vampires don’t consider your needs.
Being unrelentingly negative. Their negative energy is relentless, and energy vampires drain your positive energy by encouraging you to be negative, too.
Blaming everyone else for their problems (energy vampires don’t take responsibility for much). You know you’ve spent time with an energy vampire when you leave feeling depressed, exhausted, or sad. Energy vampires drain your positive energy for their own use. Energy vampires leave you feeling empty and sluggish–to compensate or build positive energy you may eat, drink, shop, or sleep for hours afterwards. They have an energy deficit that they must replenish.

11 Ways to Protect Yourself From Energy Vampires

-Limit the amount of time you spend with energy vampires. The less time you’re together, the less positive energy you’ll lose.
-Learn effective ways to end conversations with energy vampires
-Stay calm and detached from energy vampires. Don’t let their negative energy consume you.
-Be honest about your needs (how could you utilize your time more wisely?)
-Refrain from attempting to rescue them or fix an energy vampire’s problems.
-Practice walking away from energy vampires, the more you do it, the easier it gets.
-Limit eye contact with energy vampires.
-Avoid being in close spaces with energy vampires.
-Negative energy is catching.
-Define and guard your personal space from energy vampires.
-Tell energy vampires you feel uncomfortable discussing particular people or circumstances.
-Stand up for yourself and your boundaries! Your time, positive energy, and resources are precious and should be closely guarded from energy vampires.

( Credits: Soul Service@ Tumblr)

Thank you ABS-CBN News and Current Affairs..thank you for our every day dose of Kris Aquino and more...

ABS-CBN News and Current Affairs: " Panig sa Katotohanan, Panig sa Bayan"

Headlines:" Kris Aquino admits Herbert Bautista is special"
"Ai-Ai delas Alas feels ”like a virgin” after vaginal tightening ..."

Clap...clap..clap...Philippine Corporate media...nothing can be more real than this!

Galing...dito nakasalalay ang ating daily idea kung ano ang Pilipino at kung ano ang Pilipinas.

Salamat for keeping us informed...Thank you for making the Filipino people wiser!

Thank you for our daily dose of Kris Aquino or any other celebrity issue that has changed our lives..
Truly- I thank you for making the majority of the Filipinos informed about what is truly happening in the lives of important people in the country..

Thank you for shedding light to the plight of the Filipinos...salamat the best ka talaga!

Salamat for providing us ways to improve the country by telling us so many truths...

Paano na lang kaya kami kung hindi namin nabalitaan na tight na uli ang 'V" ni Ai-ai?

Oh how will we live without you...you complete the Filipino people. Bravo!

Salamat...because of you-- natuwa akong ako ay isang blogger at hindi journalist ng napakalaking network.

Thank you for providing respect sa mga Journalist every day..truly.

I was 12 years old. then and I am one of those who have considered journalism as a respectable job.

I have always wanted to be a news anchor, they seem to have this adventurous, intense life and people trust them...especially in the Philippines.

I am 26 years old now and so much have changed- the profession I once respected- is something I now abhor thanks to ABS-CBN and other corporate media.

To be fair I know there are so many respectable journalists out there who have truly risked their lives to bring us the truth...and isn't it unfair that they are not the faces we see on TV.

Why are we stuck with people like Korina Sanchez who openly say stupid things in front of a professional news anchor?

The days of journalist and reports on TV are over- the days where people relied on them to provide quality news is gone--especially in this country we call the Philippines.

It is sad to say, but we are just misinformed every day- every day they divert us to news that really matters- and every day the message gets lost.

We have the most crucial news about Napoles and this corrupt  politicians and yet they give us 24 hours non-stop reporting about this Deniece Cornejo who by they way is already caught but has not yet changed the life of the Filipinos.

Our Corporate media, GMA news, ABS-CBN, TV5 and more sadly--are being used to provide more lies for us.

Pag gising mo pa lang sa umaga, useless news ang makikita mo sa TV, something about traffic or vehicular accident that occurs everyday.

Pag nabalitaan ko ba na merong namatay sa kalsada ngayon- hindi na ba ako maghihirap bukas?

We lack intelligent news reporting, we lack the ability to discuss issues that truly matter and we trust these journalists to guide us to the truth and yet they betray us every day...

The Filipino people just accept the crappy news every day...we discuss about the Vagina of Ai-ai Delas alas for goodness sake!

And until this kind of reporting does not change- don't expect things to change in this country who still rely so much on television to tell them what to do..

Why I don't celebrate Mother's Day

It is May 11 in the Philippines today and chances are that your Facebook feeds is complete with Mother's Day Greetings.

Some will even have a general Happy Mother's Day greeting for all women in the world-in all languages.

I don't like celebrating Mother's Day not because I have something against good and respectable mothers- I don't like celebrating it- because I don't know what a good mother feels and looks like.

Every post about Mother's day-- every greeting that I see creates a sad feeling in me because
I don't know the traits of a good mother.

I have not been with one.

While I mean no offense to the rest of the world who knows what it means, it does feel alienating. I can only imagine the pain and the insult that people like me feel. 

Because let us face it, not everyone has a good mother, not every child was treated well, not everyone came from a complete family- there are some of us who will never experience it..and this Mother's day thing makes it even more painful..

Because not everyone has a good mother, not everyone had a good mother, not everyone has had a supportive mother- Whenever I read something about a good mom it feels as if someone is spitting on my face.


One of the biggest insecurities I have- is the fact that I did not have a stable family life.

Did not experience a mother cooking for my meals- ( thankfully for my grandma I know what it feels like to be loved by a grandma and a grand dad)
I did not experience a mother who greeted you on your birthday, did not experience a mother who prepared your lunch for school...I have not tried seeing her guide me through school, she never looked at my grades nor my sisters grades in school--I don't even think she knows what course I took.

She is a stranger who has lived beside me, someone who comes home drunk after heavy partying- someone who did not take the trouble to ask if we already ate.

I remember being sick...she never takes us to the hospital until someone forces her to do something. I remember fainting because of anemia--all she did was stare at me in the bed- calling me a weak person for feeling sick.


My mother rarely visited us she was always somewhere else. She left us with our grandmother and I had to cancel attending my highschool graduation because I know she will not be there.

I lived with her during my college days, but all I ever saw..was a woman busy changing partners...I could not count the number of Tito's and so called Dads that I had...I could not count them through the years...there had been so many...she always had a new boyfriend.

My mom and dad got separated a long time ago..and although my dad supported us financially..they were both never there for us...I was able to forgive my father because he said sorry before he died...but my mother never did the same thing...she never cared for us--I never felt it.

This woman who gave birth to me..always took the opportunity to tell me--that giving birth to me was the reason of her hardship. She always took the time to make us feel that we are the cause of her problems.

There was even one time,she forced me to believe I have another father- just so she could get money from him by using me...

She was not supportive with everything that I ever did,she keeps on discouraging me to start a business when I talk about building one. She forced me to work in another country so she could brag around with her friends...

She buys 2 pairs of expensive shoes every day---while I always had to worry If we will be eating anything decent for the day..
I have always hidden this part of my life and have only shared it to people who will understand...for how will others understand I always keep a smiling face- I have built this facade--I have posted Facebook pictures of me and my mom..in the hopes that no one will see...but I have had enough  of the lies.

There is so much more to this story--but I would rather not continue--if I will put every hardship that we went through this would not be enough and I don't want to dwell in it any longer.

I just know deep in my heart that not everyone deserves to be greeted by Happy Mother's Day...and may the  stories of people like us remind the world that Women need to be cautious of their decisions in life.

Do not have children if you are not ready to face the consequences, do not have a child if you are not willing to give it your best.
Do not have a child if your career is the only thing you want to do in your life, do not start a family if you don't even know who you are.
Do not get into a relationship if yo do not even know who you are--because it is unfair..absolutely unfair to the children  you will give birth to.

Be a mother...only if you can go through the hardship...be a parent only if you can make sure that you will be able to provide a decent life....

I am now more than ever doing well with my life even without her. I have removed her completely because I no longer want to feel pain.

I can improve my life, and I can always change my life- I don't want to blame her- I can only feel responsible for myself.

I don't always have to be the victim...and while there is still pain in my heart. I know that I will be fine, like all of the children who grew up to be wonderful people despite what has happened to their families. 

I don't want to be someone who always blames somebody else for their miseries in life like she did. I want to take responsibility of my choices.

And although this is just a small voice of someone who has experienced something like this..

Please remember that some of us exist...some of your friends have been neglected by their parents, some of your friends did not always have the happy family life that you have had.

And while my story might not be the saddest of them all...Please spare a thought for us each time you greet your parents...

Appreciate your parents who did everything for you...some of us  can only envy you from afar...

A Filipino reacting on 3D printing Technology

While the rest of the world is already talking about and using 3D printers, most of us in the Philippines are still unaware of the developments that are happening in the scientific world.

In fact, most of us are not given the chance to participate in these kinds of talk. Our schools are not really accommodating of these new ideas yet.

I am fortune to have been able to discuss some related subjects like matter and anti-matter when we were in college as well as Quantum physics theory but that's about it.
Most of the time, what we learn from school are just skills that could be used for working in companies.we are not given the opportunity to participate in actual research programs that will tackle interesting topics like 3D printing technology.

So what is this printing technology? I will provide this video to give you an idea.

Now that you have an idea...it might really sound fictitious especially for people like us. This technology still baffles me, truth be told--it seems like fiction to me...but mind you--this is as real as it can get. 

They are now using this technology to produce our I-phone casing and  every other imaginable plastics that are used for commercial purposes.

This will change the world as we know it...and even though we are in the Philippines and we have very limited information on what is going on in the rest of the scientific world. I will take time to provide my thoughts on this one....

Positive thoughts on the 3D printing technology:

If we will analyze further, countries like ours will be able to benefit with this kind of technology if it is handled correctly.

Our country has one of the highest numbers of people who are homeless..just imagine if we can have a tool that will allow us to print as many houses as we want within just a matter of days.

But of course, we have to accept the fact--that until things are changed--we will not have the chance to get hold of this kind of technology.

 I will try to be positive here, the makers of this technology mean well, Most of them like the creators of the Mink 3D printer make-up would like to create a cheaper method of printing make-up. 

The idea of the creators is to produce something that is easy to do- they like to eliminate a lot of processes that make products so expensive nowadays...

This 3D printing technology might still be science fiction especially for Filipinos, but it will change our society and we have to at least have a basic understanding of what it can do--while we have yet to predict how it will change the way we live...

I am one of those who are excited with the ability of technology to change the way we produce things.

What could be the indication of this technology in the future?

In the future, we might be able to create and customize our own cars, our own homes, our own products. In the future, perhaps 40+ years from now ( Philippine setting) maybe just 15 years for those in the U.S or London...

Who knows?

Perhaps one day if this technology will triumph, we would no longer need to rely on shopping malls and big businesses to do the designing for us. We can customize the designs of our shoes, our bags- we can create so many new products that have not been available before.

A lot of people will be able to share their creativity..we did not expect the Smart PHone technology to invade the country--but it is also changing us.

 For example, in the past we only had to rely on local news like TV Patrol and GMA news to provide us with the information on what is going on with the rest of the world...whatever they say becomes our truth...but thanks to the innovation of social media creators and authors...we now have a new set of media called Bloggers-- we can now be our own field reporter, we can spread information faster and it has led to so many life changing opportunities for everyone. 

We are educating people one step at a time, and I feel that this same benefit will also be experienced with the new designs that we will be able to come up with because of the 3D printers.

Imagine being able to design your own bag, your own shoes-- people will be given a chance to create and create and be more imaginative as they go on.

Imagine finally avoiding the need to have generic goods that come from shopping malls...oh what a brilliant technology!

We will be able to eliminate the cost of shipping as we will also be able to save a lot of time, we don't even need to make use of so many cars just to go from one place to another to shop because everything that we need is already at home and can be produced by our printers.

Our goods can be customized in the future, we would be able to experiment on the tools and upgrade them according to needs and wants.

• Creativity will surge at a really strong level and we can eliminate most of the boring designs that are being manufactured today especially with our clothes and our way of life..

We would be free to express ourselves more according to how we deem fit, and we would also gain access to a lot of creative designs.

We would also stop relying on goods that are just produced in China...because can actually produce the goods ourselves.

This technology could also eliminate the imbalanced competition between countries especially when it comes to goods production.

While this will eliminate certain jobs...it will also create new types of jobs that are probably more interesting...

I am hopeful that people will be more creative in the future...and more designers will be noticed with the help of this tool...like what happened to bloggers like me. ...

• I am looking forward to a more interesting future....

Also Check:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2530195/The-future-cooking-PRINT-dinner-Dont-scoff-3D-printers-make-food.html

Why I love Igorot Men

*Disclaimer- This writer does not claim that she knows everything about the Cordilleran Culture and does not claim to have an absolute knowledge of how Igorots act- this is just her own observation and she does not mean to do any harm to any of the said characters in this blog.

Igorot guys are probably one of the most misunderstood type of men in the Philippines, they are not clearly depicted by the Philippine media and TV shows like teledramas and movies do not do them justice. 

We are just used to film characters of Filipino men who live in Manila or someone who lives in the lowlands...but rarely about someone who lives in the Cordilleras.

Filipinos are used to seeing men  like Rico Yan, Dingdong Dantes or Richard Gutierrez- most of the Filipino male characters in movies are those with foreign blood.

We rarely see any depiction of what an Igorot guy is like- some will even have the notion that Igorot guys just simply chew momma or betel nut and just have red lips or eccentric long hair or are probably described as head hunters by stories that we see from day to day.

While, Yes, chewing momma and having red lips is very much a part of what an Igorot guy is...there is so much more to them...

I am partly Ilokana and although I have an Ibaloi blood- I was not able to  grow up in Baguio or somewhere in the Cordilleras- which means I mostly interacted with men from the lowlands when I was younger- 

Truth be told I had my own set of stereotypes for Igorot men before..whenever my grandmother and I have to ride a bus I often wonder why muscular men who have mud on their shoes ride on the bus or the jeepney wearing this Sagada weaving bag- they actually did not fit in with my idea of what gorgeous is like.

In that past I believe that men look gorgeous if they wear something that was purchased inside a shopping mall or if they have gel on their hair or if they look like the men I see in the movies...but studying in Baguio changed all of this.

I began to see the Igorots in a new light...if before I would not be caught dead hanging out with an Igorot guy because of certain prejudice that has been given to them by people in the lowlands--now I am super proud to claim them as friends.

Someone once told me why do I have crushes on Igorot men? he said it as if having an Igorot guy is something to be shameful about...I have often pondered on this statement-- this guy often told me that Igorot guys are just farmers or farm boys who know nothing about what a cultured and well-mannered society is...

The word " farmers"..how they degrade a job that is so vital to the existence of society.

I was too young then to defend an idea like this...and I am glad I was able to break this stereotyping as I got older.

In my late 20's I began to realize how wonderful the Igorots are.

Why I love Igorot Men:

Of course not all men with Igorot lineage will act like this, there are always exceptions to the rule. 

But with my  10 years of experience in interacting with them here in  Baguio who have Igorot blood I was able to form a good idea about them.

1. They are hard workers: I like the simplicity of most of my Igorot friends especially the men.

 While living in the lowlands, I was not really used to seeing hardworking guys- most of the men in the lowlands are usually hanging out in the afternoon drinking beer near a sari-sari store- perhaps its the weather.

 I mean no judgement But I have to say that my male friends here in Baguio are hardworking.

 Most of the men in the lowlands are taken care of or spoiled by the women- I hardly see them do any work-most of the time women are the ones who take care of the men...

And while this is not entirely true for  all the households here in Baguio--- because of course we cannot generalize. 

I have observed a clear distinction--using my own life.

Most of my Igorot friends have helped in constructing their own houses. 
If I ask them about the history of how their home were constructed, either they have shared in designing it, or have done some physical work in order to build their house step by step.

They are usually good cooks, they know how to clean and prepare lots of dishes.  

I hardly know of any male friend in the lowlands who can cook a mean pinikpikan or pinapaitan- partly because there are no major dishes that you could associate with men in the lowlands.

But with Igorot men you can name one the Pinikpikan..and most guys I know have been trained to cook this dish.

The Igorots were able to retain unique dishes likes the Pinikpikan- retaining your cultural beliefs does have its wonders.



This is a culture that I have not observed in the lowlands- I hardly here of any classmate of mine who were the ones who worked hard in order to finish their house- many helped their parents pay for their house but they will rarely attest to building the structure using their bare hands.

I also know that most of my Igorot friends in College have tried farming one way or the other-- again- not everyone.

But there were a lot of them who know how to plant trees, how to cultivate plants- some have experienced working in the field- and I felt that this was a good training on their part.

I know of some who know how to do sculptures, some of them have tried creating their own necklaces- necklaces that were either weaved or crafted using bones of snakes, pigs and other animals that they fancy.

2. They have a good taste in music- I have lived in the lowlands for quite some time, but have never experienced exchanging music with the men there. 

We seem to have a generic  music- the music that we listen to in the lowlands are mostly just what we hear in the radio.

I was surprised to know that most of my male friends who have Igorot blood know how to play the guitar.

It is rare if they don't know how to play any musical instrument...perhaps its the weather- 

I also did have male friends in the lowlands who can play musical instruments but I hardly see them get addicted on something that is related to music.

Upon several discussions with male friends here I have observed that they have certain recommendations on which artists should I listen to.

I was introduced to several artists that I have not even heard of- bands that playtheatrical rock and musicians that are  have not even been heard of in the mainstream scene.

I also have observed that most of them like rock music- or like the music of Mr. Big, Metallica, Nirvana...something that others would consider as complex music with complex lyrics... 

3. They are simple:

They can just wear a simple white shirt and still look amazing. 

They really don't need to try hard...

 I really have not observed my male friends in Baguio pondering too much on labels of the clothes that they wear. 

They just wear whatever they see in the closet- this I don't care attitude has endeared them to me.

And I love this simplicity.

Most Igorot males don't mind wearing second-hand clothes or clothes that someone gave them... they don't make too much fuss about the clothes on their back.

 They also have this habit of sharing their jackets to friends.

When they see a good looking jacket they ask their friend to lend it to them for a certain time-some just ask their friend to give it to them...there are stories that come  along with the jacket. 

I really prefer this simple way of clothing- and I wish this will be retained. 

Because it is so much easier to value guys who don't care about brands-- they care more about how you treat people, how you treat them and who you are...

There is no need to buy expensive shades and do all that weird stuff with their bodies. 

I love the simplicity of Igorot men. They simply don't get easily affected by what they see on TV...They dance to their own tune---and that is what I love about them the most. 

 Although of course there are some who commit the mistake of wearing shirts that are too small for them once in a while..there are still those who amaze me with their sheer I don't care attitude.

4. They are intelligent

I know a lot of Igorot men who have read a lot of books...they are critical- they don't easily get persuaded. 

Most of my classmates with Igorot lineage are  really deep thinkers.

You cannot persuade them to do certain things just because you want it done- you don't see them kissing the ass of their politicians--although of course there are those who do--i can't generalize as I have said.

But if i were to count the number of intelligent Igorot men that I know-- I would most certainly be able to give a lot of names on the list.

They are also surprisingly good writers, they debate well--to the point of sophistication.

5. They are literally gorgeous-

Because they live in the mountains, most of them would have a sturdy and strong physique. They will also be stronger than the average Filipino guy.

Most of them have muscular built when they were younger and they also age better than most men in the Philippines.

Perhaps its the intense work, or the genetic factors--I don't really know.

 Most of the Igorot males I know are tall, can carry a lot of heavy items- can work very well and can really throw a punch.

I don't like to discriminate of course there are other Filipino males who look amazing, I am just saying--Igorot males have their own charm.

They also have unbelievably broad shoulders and most of them will have this chiseled face profile. Most of them can also carry the long-hair do. 

In fact, they will absolutely look gorgeous with long hair- they will look good as a mestizo or as a moreno...

* Of course you don't have to agree with the things that I have said...this is just the way I see things and not necessarily the truth.

 But this is how I see them and this is how I would always like to see them. 

Changing the way I see the LGBT community

I grew up in a family where  no one is gay and even if we did have a gay person in the family they might be a very long distant relations and we do not have to see them every day.
I grew up in a family  gays are considered to be a source of entertainment, something to be laughed at. People who are simply funny on television or comedy bars.

And while I did not realize that I was trained to think in a manner that degrades another- things became clearer to me when I was given the opportunity to take part in an LGBT community named MCC-Baguio who is committed to protecting the right and freedom of fellow LGBTQ.

I always claim that I am a strong defender of LGBT rights, but I have to admit that there are a lot of things that I still need to know about the community I have sworn to respect and protect.

In the Philippines, while some say that they tolerate gays and have them as friends--when asked if they would like to have a gay or lesbian child--they will still hesitate- almost to the point of praying not to have a child...if they are going to become a homosexual or lesbian..

Some have even gone to the extent of describing that homosexuals are like people who are deaf, blind or mute- and while parents would profess that they could accept their child if they are gay--they could not get past the idea that if given a choice they would rather not have them for the fear that their child will suffer and be ridiculed by the people around them.

I feel sadness in my heart when I hear these kinds of statements, statements where in some will claim they will tolerate gays just as long as they will not wear a female attire- there are so many conditions presented to gays and lesbians...even up to the present time the Sultan of Brunei in 2014 has announced that any gay couple could be stoned to death.

While we interact with friends who are gays, lesbians, transgenders, queers, bisexuals...how far are we willing to support them and protect them when an oppressor like a big and strong religious denomination will attack them...how far and how long are we willing to speak up for them if we hear that they have certain rights that will be violated just because of their sexual orientation.

I ask myself that, because as I get deeper into understanding who my friends are, I am faced with opposition  with my own family and friends.

Some freely mock gays online, calling them names, providing Meme or stating ideas that are really offensive to the LGBT community- some will even profess that they do no want to mingle with homosexuals because they will go to hell according to their pastor...

And while I freely call-out anyone who tries to disrespect my LGBT friends...how many of us have the guts to do that?

My eyes are now open to the segregation that is happening--and while we interact with the LGBT community everyday--and while we claim to be their friends--how strong are we when it comes to defending them--how strong is our conviction to fight a society that continues to discriminate and provide  limiting labels...

The exposure to the LGBT community is helping me learn, there are so many things that I have misunderstood about who they are, what they are--and I feel so much ashamed because I was one of them--

We cannot claim to be an intelligent society if we are still segregating people based on  who they choose to love...

I was one of those people who laughed at them--in the past I was one of those who just believe that gays are just entertainment--and that what they go through is something that I could just ignore just because it is not affecting me.

But as I become friends with them- when I began listening to them- their fears, their worries, their beliefs- what they do, -who  they are with their families, with their lovers- their pain and the societies expectations from them I began to feel the pain and while I will never be able to understand fully what they are going through it became important to me to want to learn more.

There are so many wrong conceptions taught to us over the years by the media and by the books that we read and the current pervading norms especially in the Philippines who claim to have a Christian way of love for one another.

I have learned that we cannot stereotype or label the LGBT community, there is no one character, attribution or idea that we must give them because each have their own identity. 

We cannot say someone is simply gay because of this or that, and we must not at all cost judge someone based on what their sexual preferences or orientation is.

It was a revelation to me, at times we are quick to call someone  a 'whore" or immoral just because they do not follow certain conducts and rules  created to us by a certain group...we easily forget the humanity- the core to which these principles work...

I know now that I still have so much work to do--we have so much work to do in advancing the rights of the LGBT community and while they are now everywhere and a lot of people are coming out--there are those who are still in hiding--ridiculing themselves for being who they are--hating themselves for what has been given to them--denying themselves the happiness they so rightly deserve...

Just because the current society that we have--does not want to understand-- despite all of this I still firmly believe that the willingness to learn will go a long long way...

I open my mind to new information I receive every day--new thoughts, new impressions, new ideas each day--an open mind and a willingness to increase what we know- the willingness to accommodate the fact that we do not know everything and that the truth changes every day...

One day at a time for the LGBT community--until we get there--until the world will finally UNDERSTAND.

Suicide and Depression in the Philippines

Depression is an open topic for countries like the U.S and Finland as well as Germany but countries like the Philippines has yet to understand what depression is.

The suicide rate in the Philippines has gone up in the last 21 years and majority of the cases involve young people.
However, the country has yet to create an effective suicide prevention strategy. Much has yet to be understood on what suicide means.

Depression is not something that is discussed in class, it is not something that is widely talked about and many are still unable to connect the symptoms.

More and more Filipinos are reported to have committed suicide. Some of the most common methods that they use is strangulation, suffocation and hanging.
Some will mostly make use of self-poisoning or the ingestion of silver cleaners and other unspecified chemicals.

Many of the cases were also caused by depression, and other factors will include low income, unemployment, medical conditions as well as problems with marital status.

What are the symptoms of depression?

There is a big difference with simply feeling lonely from depression symptoms. Depression could sometimes be caused by chemical imbalance and by environmental factors. It could hinder a once jolly and motivate person to want to do nothing

A depressed individual will usually have a hard time remembering details, will have difficulty concentrating, will have decreased energy.
They might also feel guilty or feel worthless, they could also suffer from insomnia, early-morning wakefulness or excessive sleeping.
 Some will be easily irritated or restless and would suddenly lose interest in their own hobbies and activities including that of sex.
Overeating or appetite loss, persistent digestive problems, cramps and headaches could also be a sign of depression
As well as feelings of emptiness,  the inability to feel happy nor sad in certain situations.

If left untreated, a person can consider suicide,  if they are unable  to help themselves get to a more positive type of thinking they might succumb to it.

How to cure Depression?

 Depression is a phase, and the only way to cure it is to continue moving. There are a lot of people nowadays who feel this emptiness and lack of willingness to do anything but are unable to discuss what they are feeling because it is not something that is easily understood especially in a country like the Philippines where certain mental disorders are not yet understood.

There are no psychiatrist clinics here that provide proper medications for people who are suffering from manic depression. While we have centers for psychiatric disorders in hospitals, they are still unable to provide a humane and positive view on how to deal with depression.

It is not something that people discuss in this country, it is not  an accepted problem that has to be dealt with properly.

And most Filipinos are not able to afford discussing what they are going through.  There is not much study conducted on the problem.

But here are ways to lessen what you feel when you are depressed, we might not have the assistance of doctors but we can deal with it.

1. Take Long walks- if you are having pessimistic thoughts and thoughts of suicide. Pull all your strength and walk for at least an hour.
If you live in the province, make sure to go near the trees- reconnect with nature. Nature provides feelings of calmness that cannot be given by fellow humans.

Find ways to get close to nature, but if you are living in a highly urbanized area...do walk inside universities, inside campuses, places where there could be interesting things to see that will help your mind get distracted.

2. Listen to meditation music in your room.

Depression is mostly caused by negative thoughts, rest your mind for a moment by listening to Guided meditations.

There are so many guided meditations that are available and free on YouTube, if you feel  a sudden gush of sadness, put on your earphones and lie on your bed and listen to these guided meditations for a while.

No one can really promise you that everything will be alright, but you can live one day at a time.

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